Fight Less Love More

Listen to the interview.

Do You Believe Happy Couples:
1) Talk more?
2) Love each other unconditionally?
3) Don’t fight?

“If you answered yes to any of these questions, beware. Your relationship is in jeopardy!” says Laurie Puhn, the Harvard-educated lawyer, couples mediator, relationship expert and author of the new book, “Fight Less, Love More: 5-Minute Conversations to Change Your Relationship without Blowing Up or Giving In”

Laurie says that “Most couples break-up because they believe in myths. Once they learn the 3 truths about love, and use some powerful tips, their relationship can improve in minutes.”

THE 3 TRUTHS ABOUT LOVE

TRUTH #1: Happy Couples Don’t Talk More, They Talk Better. When a couple with poor communication skills talks more, their problems get worse.

3 Tips to Talk Better

Pick the right battles – Learn to ask yourself “does this affect me?” and you’ll know what to do every time.

Criticize with influence – Learn how to say what you do want, not what you don’t want.

Avoid “dumb arguments”

TRUTH #2: Happy Couples Don’t Love Each Other Unconditionally; They Love Each Other with Conditions.
Happy couples uphold a daily communication routine that brings the values of appreciation, respect, compassion and intimacy to life.

3 Tips to Create a Loving Daily Communication Routine

Say “good morning” and “good night” every day – Laurie’s survey found that of those couples who forget to say goodnight, 70% thought about ending the relationship in the last year.

Broaden your “thank-you’s”- Learn to frequently include f thank-you’s in your conversations with your honey.

Compliment your mate for their character, not only their physical appearance – In her survey Laurie asked people, “Would you rather your mate compliment you for being kind or good-looking?” 84% said “kind.”

TRUTH #3: Happy Couples Fight Too. The facts: Avoidance of arguments is a huge predictor of break-ups.
All couples fight 2 times a week, and nearly 2/3 of arguments are left unresolved.
The key to being a happy couple is to learn how to have a good fight and avoid a bad fight.

Laurie joined me earlier this year to talk about 10 Things to Say to Keep the Peace. Click here for that list.

To learn more, visit Laurie’s website www.lauriepuhn.com